Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Girl You Still Got It

Now don't get it twisted, I can still drop it like it's hot, I just have to be sure that my mate is strong enough to help me pick it up. ( LOL) .

To all my sisters, we are sexual beings from the time we enter the Universe until the time we leave. Though our desires may change; it may take longer and the earth may just grunt a little rather than move under your feet, but "girl you still got it" . No mater how old we get we should never lose our desire for human touch and intimacy.

Our sexual experiences during the menopausal phases are much like the rest of the process. It requires us and our mates to be more patient, take our time and enjoy the intimacy of each others touch rather than the final outcome. Our youth obsessed society would have us believe that peri- menopausal and menopausal women should not have sexual desire. However, numerous health journals suggest the contrary. Data shows that, the majority of menopausal women do not experience a long-term decreased in sex drive. Much depends on our overall attitude, our perceptions about menopause and the process of growing older.

Now I know many of you are saying, it's hard to focus on sex or being sexy when your' re subject to breakout in a sweat at any moment or you can barely stand to be around yourself, let alone another person. Symptoms such as mood swings, hot flashes, depression, vaginal dryness, fatigue, decrease self-imagine and changing hormonal levels can all reek havoc on our libidos. In addition, health conditions such as diabetes, depression, and high blood pressure and their associated medications can lead to decrease libido. Relationship and psychological status can also play an important role in sex drive and sexual satisfaction. Women who are in healthy relationships with a supportive mate tend to have healthier sex drives. Much the same as any other point in the adult life cycle. Remember, for women sex is 90% above the waist.

Many women actually feel liberated with menopause, no longer worrying about getting pregnant. However, we must be mindful that menopause does not protect us from sexually transmitted diseases including HIV and AIDS. So condoms and other prophylactics are still needed.

The menopausal process and all the elements associated with it including our sex drive requires us to make radical life style changes in order to make optimum benefit of this potentially life transforming time in our lives. Below are a few suggestions for addressing some of the symptoms.

Using Vaginal Lubricants or Moisturizers

You can choose from a variety of vaginal lubricants and moisturizers to improve the health of your vaginal tissue.

  • Water-based lubricants and gels: These are available over-the-counter (OTC) and treat the symptoms but not the cause of vaginal dryness. The effects are not long-lasting, so you need to reapply each time you have intercourse. Because they contain chemicals they may irritate the vagina.
  • Vaginal moisturizers: These are absorbed into the vaginal tissue and increase moisture. Also available OTC, they may not provide enough lubrication during intercourse and so lubricants may be needed.
  • Vaginal creams: These contain estrogen and are by prescription only. The creams build up estrogen levels in the vagina and may affect breast and uterine health. They may also contain irritants such as propylene glycol.
  • Vaginal Tablets: These contain low levels of estrogen and are by prescription only. Tablets are inserted into the vagina where they help thicken the vaginal walls but the estrogen is not absorbed into the bloodstream.
Stay active:
  • Having intercourse or masturbating regularly can help increase sexual responsiveness. It helps keep the muscles that support the uterus, vagina and bladder in shape.
  • Don't forget your Kegel exercises to strengthen the pelvic and vaginal muscles
  • Don't be afraid to experiment/play with toys.
Eat Healthy/Exercise
  • Stay hydrated. Increase your water intake.
  • Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables.
  • Eliminate or reduce your intake of animal protein.
  • Get moving. Engage in muscle toning and strength building exercises at least 3 times a week.
  • Take a walk. It's good for the body and the mind.
  • Try meditative exercises such as Yoga and Tai Chi.
References: Christine Northrop - The Wisdom of Menopause.
Dr. Donna.com
The Third Age

Monday, December 8, 2008

Menopause: A Natural Process


When our mothers and grandmothers went through what was appropriately called the change, there were few pills or hormones to "treat" menopause. "The change" was seen as a natural phase in a woman's life. A stage where a woman went from the childbearing years to middle age. With that came wisdom and a signal for the woman to focus inward now that the children had been reared.

In our current society where even the most natural of processes is seen as an inconvenience, the change must be managed. We treat this natural process as if were a disease. I am lead to wonder if by introducing so many synthetic substances into our bodies, if we aren't exposing ourselves to greater risks. Please note that I am not suggesting that any one break from what has been advised by their doctor. This is only my humble opinion.

It is my hope that we will use this space to support women and that we use the menopausal process as an opportunity to give birth to our creativity, renegotiate our relationships and to transform and heal our lives. It is my hope that we will share our collective stories, remedies and even our agitations in a spirit of love, humor and mutual respect.

I welcome each of you to add your voice to Sisters of the Red Moon Passing
cyber salon. In sharing our stories, we chronicle experiences that can be shared with our daughters, sisters, mothers and sister friends. Let's do this thing!